unfortunately I couldnt enjoy any of our staying there except a quick meeting with my cousin in a cafe/bar someything, I have no idea I just got carried up some stairs and I was inside unable to even speak. then I fell into a deep sleep, waking up in winter wonderland haha. snow everywhere on the way back. and it was green and purple lights all over and a view that reminded me of Malibu coast.
me mom and matt are some crazy ass ppl. lol. I had a great celebration with my friends the day before, also that with a lot of laughter.
I think laughing is more healing than anything else, I had a great birthday(s) :)
im not feeling very good today or yesterday... to be honest. and Im not at all grateful that I survived. I know I should be grateful for this and fucking that but im not. im sorry