Thursday, October 30, 2014
Sometimes, just sometimes when I get sad over my situation... when it becomes so really hard to deal with, I find myself to have the power to change my thinking to how small this world is and what this life really is? why do we take it so seriously? We all come from realms of unimaginable power and light and we will return to those realms.
So, why worry and dwell?
I beleive that before you are born you choose your life and what you want/need to learn from it so apparently I chose to go trough this incredibly though experience just because there is something that I needed to learn from it. OR maybe I was just curious to see how it is to really feel LIFE. If everything comes easy then whats the point? how can you grow, having all things going your way?
Im glad I chose this life because I have experienced soo much crazy,weird,rare and things I could never even tell you about. They are my precious memories that I keep inside me and they are so very strong and I feel them on the deepest level. so much it hurts.. I have found people from other lifetimes and that I am grateful for.
have you ever met a person that you just know that you already know? or a person who you love always no matter what. like a mother loves its child... (if shes not a crackhead lol juust kiddin)
I still wish that one day I get to sit at the beach with my soulmates and laugh at all this pain and terror. like it never happened and I am reunited with my people <3 it will happen I just know it. and I wont wait too long. I decide my future with my mind which is a galaxy open to everything and all that is and isnt.
Wednesday, October 29, 2014
|Aloe and Andrews leg|
This is LOVE
Today I was forced to go along and go bowling and it was so horrible! I cant help but feeling humiliated and I hate doing what I dont want to do. I always do whatever I want to do whenever i wanna do it and it has worked out fine for me almost all my life.
I have understood the power of kindness and how easy and fulfilling it is! why isnt everyone just nice to each other? I mean, it doesnt cost anything and it doesnt hurt anyone, actually the opposite.
be kind and help people.. even if you get treated like shit yourself and no one helps you. be helpful ANYWAY
like that poem by Mother Theresa, I love that poem cuz it reminds me of a special someone called Andrew..
Now I need to sleep, i feel awfully pleased with what I have accomplished today even tho I had to go trough the damn bowling session..
Monday, October 27, 2014
Sunday, October 26, 2014
Saturday, October 25, 2014
Hi my loved ones!! Good news, Ive found a new treatment that I will attend once a week that replaces stem cells and repair nerves and it has helped so many people to walk again and that is now what the money from my fund will go to. This is a much more realistic money goal and a better chance of me walking again! I AM SO HAPPY! Come on people spread the link :D I AM SO HAPPY THAT I COULD JUMP FROM A BUILDING HAHAHA!! jk
seriously I really think there is a great chance that this will make me walk omg omg omg
the treatment will start in 2 weeks
SPREAD: HELP CHLOE WALK
Friday, October 24, 2014
Hi Chloe, we don't know each other and I have NEVER reached out to someone I don't know but I feel led by my spirit too. I live in ------ and by some small chance I heard about you and you falling and getting hurt and I literally was about to do my first youth message on July 13th, when they said the 13 floor, all of it together just made me cry and I kept weeping not even knowing you or anything about you. I felt led to add you as a friend but had no clue what to say to you then last night I had a dream and in it you were walking again but slowly. You were still going through healing and pain but you were smiling in the dream the whole time and you had a new life about you as tho you had been healed from the inside out. I felt led to share that with you and tell you that your life is not over. I don't know if you have anyone who is encouraging you, praying for you, but I would like to offer my number to you and tell you to feel free to text me, call me. My number is--------. I pray today that God will keep surrounding people around you that will help lift you up. Encourage you and you have to keep fighting and ask yourself? I lived through an awful fall. Why? Why am I still here? What is my true, God given purpose in this life? These are deep questions that I think you should seek out and I believe as you do, you will find the answer and that answer will bring you joy and comfort. The girl I saw in my dream was not a sad girl but a girl who had new found hope;) Love & Blessings to you-----
Too tired to answer your comments, I cant believe how jealous some people can be that I received 1000$ for my fund.. its even less than I used to pay for a months rent and you cant just let me have that without calling me a liar n say I take ppls money and what not? Its just a couple of friends that have donated and im so grateful I don't even know what to say <3
stop caring so much about money! Its just paper. but im my case its an opportunity to walk again. I do not care for material things or money anymore all I want is to Live and walk and be happy.
I will give back to people when I have the opportunity, it gives me so much joy to give. Isnt it like that for all people?
Today I wont let me anexity out. Ill keep it in its cage and see the world trough heart shaped glasses
Love is so powerful and it can come around in any shape, taste or feeling ;)
Thursday, October 23, 2014
Sunday, October 19, 2014
what if I told you that being in a wheelchair doesnt automatically make u inspirational, strong or brave? :O
Lol. I keep getting messages from people that say im all those things, strong, brave and inspirational but why? its the first thing that ppl say to each other with the same injury as me.. like robots cuz they feel bad and honestly Im getting sick of hearing it cuz its not true, im not strong! wtf Im here crying all days and all I wanna do is to get high and die.
then I wont accept that im paralyzed. im living in the past and that can only be for a limited amount of time. I realized that a while ago hah
Im brave cuz I keep on living and going trough it all but what else can I do? I dont have much of a choice do I?
Also I dont feel like myself associating with others in the same situation, it makes me uncomfortable and very depressed. I wont accept living less of a life than I used to, why should I settle with this incredible fucked up life that killed all my dreams. Im not human anymore and im not an inspiration for others. Id tell them that it wont get easier and u cant live a normal life ever again. And if you do then you are just settling for less.
might aswell hang urself cuz there will be no more exciting traveling, no running in the sand at a beach in Bali, no climbing a small hill. not even hiking! surfing, fucking in a cheap motel somewhere in vegas, no, cuz u will most likely be alone for the rest of your "life".
-You ppl with legs still working, you better get up and dance right NOW! and appreciate running errands in the rain while your favorite pair of shoes getting ruined. You better fucking love it.
I wont accept this that has happened to me.
Im not that kind of person.
Saturday, October 18, 2014
Friday, October 17, 2014
|everyday chill in the sun|
My old place was nice I really miss it
for a while I lived in a real shitty place in West LA, right after I was homeless..
I cant beleive I used to live like this! *Crack palace*
haha what an upgrade I made tho! I Love it, Ive had a fucking insane life and I regret nothing!:')
|heart shaped My favorite things lol|
Wednesday, October 15, 2014
I have only one month left in this rehab... I have not decided what to do or where to go after but its scary. Im loosing (a lot of) hair because of my bodys reaction to all of this, Im scared everyday from the minute I wake up of the future...
Its scary how my body is changing, people are changing and everything seems dark.. thinking about the past is ripping my heart in pieces. I dunno what to do with myself.
Tuesday, October 14, 2014
"Yes your 'story' stinko del mucho- what are you trying to pull? Why are you doing this? No-one will believe or respect you ever again. This is a very serious matter- where is your proof? You are a writer you say and actress yes? You are a model? Period"
"Is there anything about you that is real?"
"Anyone smelling a rat here?"
"You still have not told everyone how this happened? We cannot support you unless you explain this - people will need more info- 13 floors? That is impossible to survive and you have not a scratch? You are a miracle surely???"
WOW! Im chocked by the comments I saw this morning. Apparently 'people' do not believe that I fell 13 stories and survived! Id never in a million years think that would be the thought on anyone's mind!! Probably cuz theyre liars themselves tho..
first of all, why would I lie about something so serious like that? To get attention or to make "a great story" out of it? is that what you think?
How would I then get paralyzed like this? how would I break 38 bones?
U need proof?!
I hate to waste energy on a thing like this that is already sucking the life out of me everyday but I can get the police report and show you proof. Im a miracle survivor yes if u wanna call it that. Its not at all impossible to survive such fall but its rare yes and that I didnt get a single scratch on my head is really a miracle too but it was my left arm that my head landed on and thats why my arm broke totally in several places and got a nerve damage so I couldn't move my hand or fingers.
Anyway, I have several friends that are proof that I fell 13 stories as well.
Im not going to be called a liar and be sitting in a wheelchair like this having to convince people on such serious matter.
Monday, October 13, 2014
Saturday, October 11, 2014
Id like to tell you and tip you about this app that I recently found and I love it! Its called Piccing and its for all girlies who loves fashion, beauty, accessories etc..
With this app you can:
Browse pictures by any category that you feel interested in, Picc the pictures you love, buy items directly from the pictures you love!
It makes your life easy when it comes to shopping. I think its great to have all the things you love collected in one app and being able to find just those items that catches your eye directly online!
Its a simple and amazing app that youll get for free! Download it and see everything it has to offer :)
Friday, October 10, 2014
I dont want this to be a fucking handicap blog, full of miserable texts about how much I hate my life but everyday I realize more n more small stuff that irritates me... I cant wear any pants cuz they crumble up in my ass in the chair and I cannot wear long shirts, jackets or anything too thick. and forget high heels ofc which I used to live in. I cant take this shit much longer
come on n work legs, work again already!!
|at least I can still play with my nails hah|
Monday, October 6, 2014
I need you guys to try this drink, it's incredible healthy and it gives you a really awesome kick! It's my fav drink to kick start every morning! All you need is a juice presser tho.. Which you probably don't! Ask your friendly neighbors if not
All you need is:
- 2oz lemon
- 1oz green apple
- 1oz ginger
Remember, the more Ginger the better kick. if it burns ur tongue then you know its done right!